the sky is falling!...

Actually, no, that was just the large chunk of drywall from my ceiling hitting the floor. It's a bit soggy and makes a dull, wet thud as it lands. No, we aren't redecorating the living room for that Underwater Tunnel ambiance, the roof decided to take a big ole' crap and shower us with love, as it were. If the fucker burned to the ground tomorrow I would roast marshmallows and sing Kumbaya I swear to God.

Word to the wise and the stupid alike: Stay the fuck away from fixer-uppers. They are the bastions of evil on earth.

got a new toy...

And the wife is probably going to strangle me. Maybe. But, I bet she likes it:)

Ok, so changing the site address...

Dang that was kind of a bitch! Kept screwing up the title. Anyway here we are. I thought the hyphenated web address was a little tedious so there is the reason behind the move.

Enjoy :)

Dick sprays fellow shooter, news at 11 or whenever the hell we feel like it...

Ok, so let's recap a little here.

First, Bush and Co. stole the 2000 election and were given the WH by the SOTUS.
Then, Bush was reading with his classmates when some wackos pulled a crash and burn.
Next, we have the Call To War! Yes, folks these bastards are all out to get us so we have to get them first. Typical asshole bully behavior.
Let's not forget our illustrious leaders listening in on the phone like they still used a party-line(Pretty much done away with in the late 80's to early 90's).
And now! Yes, now we have Big Limp Dick huntin' some grub or some shit and instead shoots his 'friend' in the face. What else should we be on the lookout for? Bush snorting coke off Condi's ass? Or maybe Rove losing his shit on the White House lawn, throwing his clothes in the fountain and scaling the fence shouting obscenities at the tourist? Oh wait, I know! Laura finally admits what we have all been wondering, she just married him for the pretty shoes.

Wonders never cease.

"i must say, the way you load that is absolutely amazing..."

Hello and such everyone! (All 5 of you who read this) I have been on vacation, hanging out with the kid and working around the house the last couple of weeks so sorry for the delay in writing.
Now, without further delay...

Some men are extremely adept at very many things; baseball, driving, speaking, fucking...
Some are adept at just a few; speaking, fucking...

And some have a talent that is beyond compare.

I am one of those talented souls.

I can load any dishwasher, anywhere, better than anyone. Including the owners of said dishwashers.
Now, I know, there are some of you out there who are in total awe of me at this moment but please don't make fools of yourselves throwing praise my way. Or money. Or phone numbers.
Just know that hard and long as you may toil, you could never best me at this feat. Don't even try. I don't have enough tissue in the world to sop up all the tears of defeat.
My skills have been honed through years of intensive and grueling training. I began my adventure with a late 80's model Whirlpool. It was small, loud, and trimmed out in chrome plating. But I taught it to love the large skillets and heavy glassware. It was my bitch. I have since conquered a Kenmore, Hotpoint, and am working on my second older Whirlpool. This Whirlpool, having heard the lore surrounding his distant cousin's mighty defeat gave up easily with nary a rebellious rinse cycle! Oh yes! Dishwashers shall no longer take advantage of their owners. They shall no longer refuse to accommodate those bulky pots and pans. Let it be known far and wide that there is a force to be reckoned with.

That force has a name. He is Dishwasherman!



Check local listings for showtimes in your area. Look for the action figure at a retailer near you. Read the bestselling book "Days with Dishwasher and Other Tales".